Just b r e a t h e . . . .

Now that the holiday hustle and bustle is over and the year is winding down, wouldn’t it be wonderful to take a deep breath and wind down a little with it? The last week of the year is unique as we recuperate from an extra busy month and begin gearing up for a new year. As caregivers, we need to take advantage of these few days and make a conscious effort to let go of unnecessary obligations and just b r e a t h e. . . Even though your caregiving responsibilities continue, seek for a quiet moment or two and take pleasure in one of the activities below (or one you would enjoy) this week, even if you can only do it mentally. Many of the activities can also be done with your loved one if you wish. If you are like most caregivers, you have unselfishly devoted yourself to everyone except yourself this year. During this last week, please take some time to relax, appreciate, and rejuvenate yourself for a job well done by:  

• Taking a walk and appreciating nature

• Watching a sunrise or sunset

• Taking a long hot shower or soak in the tub

• Taking a drive on a pretty road

• Visiting with a friend on the phone

• Laughing

• Watching a favorite TV show or movie with good snacks

• Reading 

• Holding hands with a loved one

• Listening to music

• Preparing some comfort food 

• Or ???

The important thing is that you break up the busy caregiving routine a little and  

b r e a t h e. . . 

The Gifts of Caregiving

During this holiday season, my thoughts have turned to the blessings and gifts of caregiving. Now that my own parents and other loved ones have passed away, I have traded long days caring for them for shorter visits to the cemetery to place a Poinsettia and provide loving care for their gravesite.  Days of stress, exhaustion, and guilt have given way to tender memories of doing my best to serve those I have loved.

Connie Goldman, author of The Gifts of Caregiving (available at Amazon.com) shares that through the caregiving experience “many of us learn something deeply meaningful and profoundly spiritual about ourselves. . . . We can expand our vision, touch new depths of compassion and gratitude, and reassess our priorities. A daughter, herself in her sixties, shared with me [the author] some thoughts as she reflected back on the time when she sat with her dying semiconscious mother. “Hard as it all had been taking charge of her personal care, seeing my own living patterns changed in almost every conceivable way, struggling with the guilt of never doing enough, still in some way I can’t really explain there’s been some immeasurable value in me just being there for her. Through this experience of caregiving, I think I’ve really grown and learned a lot about myself.”

My hope for each of you during this holiday season is that you will be able to take a few quiet moments to appreciate not only the immeasurable gift you are giving your loved one by walking alongside them in their journey, but the priceless gift they are giving you with their presence. 

Merry Christmas. 

Holiday Tips for Caregivers

Jude Roberts, a staff writer for Caregiver Magazine, shares some holidays tips for enjoying the holidays with your loved one. She states that “the key is to pace yourself, as well as to help your loved one do the same, so that neither of you will feel completely drained, depressed or overwhelmed, especially during such a special time of year.” A few more of her suggestions include: 

Try not to schedule too many social events, one right after another. Remember, when it comes to holiday events, it's the quality, not the quantity, that counts. 

Make sure that your loved one gets a chance to have some quiet time away from all the noise, stress, and chaos that is a natural part of the holidays. It’s best to spend some quiet time together, so that you both get a chance to unwind from recent events. 

Although it’s the holiday season, try to maintain the daily routine you and your loved one are used to doing.

Even before an official gathering, continually speak about the people who will be coming to visit, or who you’ll be visiting, so that the person you’re caring for will begin to start looking forward to some social time.

Play seasonal music around the house, and serve their favorite, seasonal food.

Don’t focus on how the holidays “used” to be, but focus instead on what a wonderful gift it is to have your loved one with you for yet another holiday season. The top-two priorities for you during this time of year is maintaining health and happiness, for the person you care for and for yourself as well.

Copyright1995-2010 Today’s Caregiver magazine

Adapted and reprinted with permission from http://caregiver.com/magazine/index.htm